Jokes Jokes Jokes

[sidherose]

Actually, I witnessed what appeared to be such a mother in WalMart once. Cute little girl in the cart seat grabbing and doing the 'Gimme, gimme' hand thing, screamed like a banshee and the woman is going through the Toy aisles. She was evidently looking for a present for an older sibling or some other kid. Cuteness flew out the Garden Center door real fast as one aisle went to another making her way along. She never raised her voice but just said "No!" "No! You're not getting it!" That's all. And it never stopped, in any aisle subsequent. Not that I was following her around. She was everywhere I went. 

[thelufias]

Another exception to the rule LOLOL.....   

Granted....on a rare occasion I do see where the child will finally give up and behave...but that's normally when they are with the Grandparents....

Oh wait.....

That's because we give them what they want.....

Never mind LOLOLOL

[Scouseaphrenia]

And they're both Certifiable! Either that or they're both into tentacle porn. I can't decide which.

Of course I'm certifiable... why else would I be in this place? And as for the other...

[Jherrith]

It's a joke, J.

Yes we know, tis called dry humor on my part

[thelufias]

A college business professor could not help but notice that one of his students was late to class for the third time that week. Before class ended he went around the room asking students some questions about the day's lecture. Of course, he made sure to pick on his tardy pupil.

"And who was it that developed the theories behind communism?" the professor asked.

"I don't know," the student said.

"Perhaps if you came to class on time, Mr. Reebs, you would know," said the professor.

"That's not true," the student replied. "I never pay attention anyway!"

[Jherrith]

Snicker

[thelufias]

While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting and old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,"Are there any gators around here?!"

"Naw," the man hollered back, "they ain't been around for years!"

"Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore.

About halfway there he asked the guy,"How'd you get rid of the gators?"

"We didn't do nothin'," the beachcomber said.

"The sharks got 'em."

[thelufias]

A circus owner walked into a bar to see everyone crowded about a table watching a little show. On the table was an upside down pot and a duck tap dancing on it. The circus owner was so impressed that he offered to buy the duck from its owner. After some wheeling and dealing, they settled for $10,000 for the duck and the pot.

Three days later the circus owner runs back to the bar in anger, "Your duck is a ripoff! I put him on the pot before a whole audience, and he didn't dance a single step!"

"So?" asked the ducks former owner, "did you remember to light the candle under the pot?"

[Jherrith]

[Scouseaphrenia]

got up this morning and my legs were killing me...





they were wrapped round my throat....